Looking for Spuffy Fic

[ladyamadaun.livejournal.com]

I am going crazy searching for a fic I read about  at Elysian Fields website, i think,  a while ago.  It has Spike getting bite or stung by a demon whose venom attacks the vampires mind, causing a lot of pain, feral episodes and halluciations, if I remember right.  it happened while on patrol with Buffy.  The main scene I remember is Spike recovering in the basement without enough brain power to remember his name or Buffy's but he has a sort of poetic William moment watching her come down the stairs.  Really poetic stuff.  and he thinks that he would do anything for this goddess and follow her anywhere, and she takes care of him and tells him to go to sleep.  Sound familiar to any one?  I could use all the help I can get.  It is written to have happened in series 5 I think, but am not sure.